varchar. nurff. me.

2010-10-29T08:12:00.000-07:00

feel like giving up, throwing the towel. Its seems to be something that i usually do in the phases that i go through like a cycle.

i feel this cycle as if i was dancing salsa, "1 step forward, 1 step back, 1 step forward, 1 step back". i hate how i keep trying to not reach being so emo but then it just hits me like how reality slaps people in the face. From the Nissan Cube to new stuff now i have, they are just things which might boost my confidence yet here i am thinking i am going to give up on.

guess its how i think too much that led to all the problems, like my 'habits', what Chen Hui said "not taking the initiative" and being too arrogant. how can i be myself, or be who i really am? why do i seem to have a problem communicating ? do i need a professional listener? am i alright?

maybe all i ever need was you, a goal, or else i'm just wondering aimlessly, dancing salsa.

--nurff

2009-11-17T16:05:00.000-08:00

ah! finally i've gotten my rest. these few days has been a rush. having to do SE and having to do SACP. although i gotten my rest, i have succumb to laziness as i have yet to finish my database design for the Payroll System S:.
anyways i have lucky yesterday, having to walk toa payoh, seeing a lot of things and eating chicken rice that brings back old memories.
i was very happy on the Sunday as the Mercedes Benz Citaro is going to be part of SMRT's fleet of buses.laying in teban gardens, waiting to run on the public roads. it is said that it will run only about May next yr. with the Citaros on the road, that will be my priority.
Lastly, after cutting my hair, hope that i can gain some confidence in myself.
my haircut wasn't so bad after all.

first time driving outside!

2009-11-06T07:29:00.000-08:00

its my first time driving out and i miss the manual car already. the Honda City was a superb car, compared to my dad's car. i felt multiple things that i didn't like, which unresponsive gas and brake paddle and no feel/sudden steering. compared they are worlds apart but still i have to try all of them out!
been a quick week this week, as i still can recall in COS, 3SA being sad and DI doing the card reader. this week really passed fast and was a happy one as i have gotten my license. A hard earned one. Must thank all those that help me through.
Seen many funny through this wk, seeing 410 fully WAB, yet seeing a O405. couldn't rmb the rest, will post the pic if i'm free. till then
cheers
Kenneth

good things comes in pairs

2009-10-19T09:03:00.000-07:00

good things comes in pairs, apparently i got three, so that isn't great. Firstly my computer is suffering from blackouts, i got "saw" jaw and my tooth has just bled the basin uncontrollably. retardedly i always fear for the worst =S.

back from france-belgium-nederlands trip and i have said i will change, hopefully for the better. school has started and i don't seem to change. pardon me for not going some events lumpy, trying to adapt.

its about 2-3 weeks since i'm back and i have yet to give my friends the souvenirs that i have gotten for them. i feel bad but will do it pretty soon.

hope i can rectify my problems and solve them as swiftly as possible.

Brazilian F1 GP

2009-10-17T12:18:00.000-07:00

i'm so tired, stayed up for F1 at Brazil. delayed as there is a major flood. i was so tired that i place my toothpaste into the cupboard, btw my toothbrush has a new home there. i have thought about a couple of things these few day, my last week of my holiday, something about buses and roads in singapore and a proposal of my fav brand. with that i shall start my description of the buses and roads.

firstly there are 2/3 ways you will think when you're in a bus.
1st, when you're in a fast bus, you'll find that singapore has a lot of traffic lights.
2nd, when you're in a slow bus, you'll find that the bus is super slow.
3rd, i can't remember, and will fill it in when i do recall it.

guess you shd be able to distinguish which bus is fast and which is slow.
and with this i'm going to end. =)

Question and Answer

2009-10-08T17:12:00.000-07:00

morning!
i'm back from France trip and i have undo the jet lag which lasted for 3 days.
since i came back, i have not really talked to anyone other than Yanming, and a few friends online.
looking at fdg's blog and realised that i am something like her yet i feel that i could be the solution, but it couldn't happen, as we're of different kind.
had been on to the knight and knave game and it was something i thought was so cool back then, Knights always tell the truth and Knaves always lie. if anyone chance upon this book please let me know.

guess this shd about where i end, will be a long day for me later, having to get breakfast, chase a bus, call canon, go to ikea and etc.

hope today will be a great day

have a good day everyone.

i love that sentense.

2009-09-20T07:56:00.000-07:00

i love the public phone, i know what to talk about. Guess i lwft myself on the public phone back in 2-3 yyears ago.
glad i talked to 3 beautiful girls but wasn't bold enough to give her a call =S.
Anyways take care to all and hope to see you guys soon.

Regards,
cayennurff/kennethk.
At the ChangiA.Port

Photos of Holidays

2009-09-14T02:19:00.000-07:00

First few pictures of my blog.
Me going to Woodlands to service my laptop, handphone and dad's handphone. Seeing the Buzz having a weird display, or maybe a default display.
A day going to J8 for a walk and suddenly rained. images of me in the rain.
Bag for sale! - Golla of Finland. Chorus 15.4" Laptop bag. $50. text me if interested.

SBS3916P

2009-09-14T02:06:00.001-07:00

SBS 3916P is back at Bishan Bus Interchange. My childhood bus for 410. Now back at 55. Previously at 138 serving people to the Zoo. 410 is now almost with the new scania buses. and i hope that 3916P will stay either on 138 or 55 with 502U and many MBs, like 436C/435E and 501Y on 58.

Limit

2009-09-12T21:24:00.000-07:00

LIMIT.
to everything there is a limit.
there is times where i don't wish to judge a person, but it always forces me to.
i'm just stuck between something which i can't describe and i want a change yet bounded to something not willing to.
i'm starting to lose sight of myself, losing sight of her, mistaking someone else for her. have i forgotten, or shd i let it go.
really wonder the word stress? sub-consciously resulting in stress or purposely creating. i'm really wondering. there are really times where i really wonder if i'm significant? like sometimes it doesn't bother if i'm not around anymore. i feel like taking a break. this life that i have to clear up is tiring. how and where do i start?
there are times where i think too much and when i see other doing the same as me and i really wonder should i help them clear that confusion or leave them to suffer like me ?i really frustrating.
food for thought.
is there anyone out there who cares?

idler

2009-09-03T03:35:00.000-07:00

idler
sigh. wanted to post 2 days ago, but was quite lazy. here i am writing about it.

2days ago.
bus drivers nowadays are like rally drivers, driving through a pool of water and going faster. no fear for aquaplaning ? but it really is great to have them going fast. enjoyed the bus ride.

yesterday.
went to zouk with my sister. man i am really a nub. its my first time and quite embarrassed. but it was great experience. really makes you forget some stuff. now i need to find a grp of friends for clubbing.

today
realised that steam had noticed the idler and has cleared the item through idling. man i was sure unlucky. was just wondering why bigfoot was in a weird game and asked to try, in the end caught even though i didn't get anything that i wanted. sigh i really wished that i had my ambassador back. and really regret using the idler, if it wasn't for the idler, i would have a hat by now. =<

anyways i shall just use the conventional method and play till i get an ambassador and a hat then. Hope i get the pyro beanie.

its has been a great weekend

2009-08-29T19:47:00.000-07:00

its has been a great weekend
whoo. finished my networking exam, tmr is ERP. been out of track these few days, preparation of my trip. been trying to see what car my dad can get in france and i made him change the car type 3 times already and didn't know he has to change it one more time. now inside my head is the comparison of the volvo v50 or the citroen grand c4 picasso. i did like to see how the citroen car is with the panoramic view. but i trust the volvo for safety and eco. well see how it goes then. gotta prepare for exam, but there is f1, there is france. all stopping me from studying * aww excuses again.
that the end. shall post again.

Viewsonic E72F+

2009-08-27T07:31:00.000-07:00

Viewsonic E72F+
man, its been a day since i sold my CRT Monitor and i really miss it a lot. When its not there really sinks my heart. should have sold the other one first. tmr is my first exam, netcom and i've not really started my thorough revision. hope i can clear it smoothly.
now i wish that i can sell the rest of the stuff fast then i can get a new screen instead of a CRT.
all the best to me!

2009-08-25T09:06:00.000-07:00

G.I. Joe
today went to study at kfc like yesterday but failed. it was quite a number of people and i met shili and her bf. thereafter went for a spin in a bus ride and watched G.I. Joe. awesome! a 8.5 out of 10 stars(my rating). really great, i'd watch it again. weirdly search for car rental for dad when i've a test this coming friday. All the best to myself and hope that i can concentrate to study tmr.
me out.

dislocating hands

2009-08-23T07:49:00.000-07:00

dislocating hands
my hands have felt like they were trying to dislocated themselves from my torso. just as much as the crab my dad bought from NTUC, which he dropped while putting it into a plastic bag. it also dislocated its claws to relieve from its pain. just like today's the pit crew had to forget to bring the tires? man its was so crucial, win and 1st runner up. but anyways great race and tremendous win from the Brawn team and Rubens.
haven been up to do anything but will need to finish up test papers for the upcoming tests this fri.

burning!

2009-08-17T22:50:00.000-07:00

who turned on the oven ? i'm burnin'!
not feeling well today, inside my aircon room and it feels like i'm suffocating. Didn't do much today and thinking of selling my Monitor.do you think $30 worth the price?

haha my sister talked to me yesterday and she thanked me for taking care of her cats, then i asked her the same question which i asked her before, and she said why am i so weird, yea i agree, why am i so weird?

seems like 100Plus is not working on my fever now. awww man i am heating up like a hotdog in the toaster. okay shall end it here, i need to say away from the computer.

~

2009-08-15T09:39:00.000-07:00

went to my sister's house to feed her cats today and catch the movie 爱情萬龄. Nice movie, about love. suddenly brings me back to myself, i not sure whom i like now. the other day i was just saying that i was in hibernation mode and when i had to stay overnight, i came out of the it and became work mode. maybe my heart also went into hibernation. but anyways it was a great movie and the cats watched with me.

regarding my laptop, i will thereafter decide. test comes first. how i did wish my laptop is linked to my brain, then it blogs what i think when i'm bathing. Always get good sentence then, and when i come to my laptop, its all gone. Unsure why?

really feel like falling love.

Confusiion

2009-08-13T17:57:00.000-07:00

Had my makeup lesson yesterday and it was not say great but understandable. Have started my consideration of getting a new laptop again. Sigh but i have yet to get a conclusion. thought of using some random stuff for choosing, and i encountered the bus number 2631 S. S42, X31 so which.

There is never a perfect stuff in the market now. i like the S42 but quite heavy weight. i like the EX460's weight but no performance. But when you have the perfect stuff like Sony vaio z series, the prices hit roof high.

now i'm really stuck and curious.whether should i send my laptop for servicing and continuing using or buy a new one and don't bother plus i got 2 tix for a dance performance, who wants to go with me ?

I just realised something. a) would you buy something cheap and pay expensive bills or b)get something expensive and pay bills not that expensive?

notebook

2009-08-12T05:57:00.000-07:00

i have set my mind to not sell my laptop at the moment. have started falling in love with BenQ again. Quite interested in the S42 and X31 and thus the Q41. so shall keep it still unless this coming Comex will have great offer.

telling Nz the other day that regret buying my notebook, now I'm taking it back because i love the metallic feel of it. Compare to the HP from sch and the U330, they just lag the things i feel compulsory.

study break has begin, it's the first day I've started slacking and walking around Singapore. tmr is my make-up lesson and i hope that i can understand and at least pass my retest. All the best to myself.

a new blog a new beginning

2009-08-11T05:30:00.000-07:00

Been trying to continue my old blog but unable to keep it up and it has been carrying a lot of memories since i was in secondary school.

a new blog for me, a new beginning. like to tell all the others whom i have not linked your name, it will be done shortly.

back from my presentation. tired. sian. Been debating on whether to sell my laptop to get a new lightweight one or get a netbook ? Please give me some clue.

hope that this blog of mine can launch successfully. Will be including a much private blog for close people soon.